Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Jennise 20:10, a revelation of sorts.

many people will tell you what to do, wether they mean to or not.
many people will say "keep going to school, the suffering is worth it" or "just stick through it"
I say to hell with that.
I'm almost twenty years old, and maybe I'm just starting to figure this out
but I feel so close.
I hate school, we dont mix, and I was mainly going because everyone was surrounding me with spears.
I think tonight I realized what I want to do...
everyting.
I want to learn as much as possible and have tons of different jobs in all ranges of the feild.
I want to travel and build and better people and live my life until it falls beaten to the ground
and then I'll beat it some more
"because I've got far too much left in me"

ALSO
I need to do this all for me
and tonight, that hit me.
I may be with people a lot
but really, I'm all alone.
"live together, die alone"
and if i cant be happy alone, I'm not happy around people
and vice versa
(wtf did i just say?)

I'm getting into the best shape of my life
and I'm finally getting comfortable in my skin
truely comfortable
I am starting to feel beautiful
inside
and out
and not matter what you do
I will only grow and thrive and laugh in your face

as of late, I've secluded myself from reality and the world
and that will continue until I come out of hybernation.
I'm going to focus on my world
because it's selfish
and the strongest, hardest thing I have ever done.

and one day
I'll prove to you
this was it.
this was all it took.

live your life.

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