because

im broken, im greasy, im yours. am i what you want, or need? why am i typing at almost one AM when i have to wake up at 5?
you. im ruin, but you stay here. im a pile of rubble, but you carve me into stone. the brook that babbles, and you listen to me, thus slowly i form a stream.
i am weak, and yes, its because i allow myself to be. admiting is the first step, but fuck the second, i make my own rules.
yes, i ruin your good days, i have bad thoughts and i write about them, dont you? just because i came into your life 3 months ago doesnt mean its all rainbows and fairydust for you, babe, you have toils too.
im sorry for letting my feelings out on this screen, but sometimes i need to just let my fingers work it out, just because i have 3 people to talk to doesnt mean it will fix it all.
im working on me, give me time, but trust me, i do enjoy your help.